I've got a birthday coming up. So it's time to sum up all my knowledge.
1. There's a very thin line between being a "cool old guy" and being a "creepy old guy."
2. I'm part Italian, part Irish and part French Canadian. So I eat with the Italians and drink with the Irish. I haven't figured out the French Canadian part yet.
3. Two things I swore I'd never do but did anyway - 1) Go into radio. 2) Get married.
3. If I can find a woman who'll agree to our wedding song being "Lawyers, Guns and Money" I'll remarry.
4. Be they child substitutes or (in my case) the girlfriend experience, pets are wonderful companions. But if you think you need a chimpanzee you're nuts.
5. Once a weasel, always a weasel.
6. Not having kids has worked out very well for me. But if you look at #3 you know things don't always end up the way I've planned.
7. As Jim Morrison once said, "you cannot petition the Lord with prayer." As my recent experience seems to prove.
8. Getting along with my ex-wife is something I'm proud of.
9. The lower down the food chain the tastier the food. I haven't met a bivalve I didn't like.
10. It's time like these when I appreciate my friends.